My mom died one year ago today.

I went to the crooked tree where we spread her ashes today. I have also uploaded pictures of her.



My mom, in the '70s, with one of her boas.

+27 more, thumbnail gallery.

I love you, Mom.

Here are some more kitten photos. Kittens wearing costumes. Also, my dragon fountain.

( Pictures! )

Halloween was awesome. dootchan (my sis) was The Doctor (we knitted a super long scarf; she did most of it, but omg so much work, lol).

strawberryjeli came to the party in a Star Trek TOS uniform (super mini and all!).

zlatohrbitek was Spike from Buffy. He went to work in the costume on Friday -- only one person recognized him! SOMEONE THOUGHT HE WAS EDWARD. Oh, what is this world coming to?!? I went as Buffy to compliment him. XD

We watched "Once More With Feeling" and played Sing Star and ate nachos. We gave out all the candy we bought; we had quite a few trick-or-treaters this year.

These are long overdue, long promised photos! Pic heavy but they are pictures of cute animals, so I think it is worth it. ;)



Mustachioed Morgan in the sun!

( +2 more! )



OM NOM NOM NOM. I gave ChuChu a parrot-sized lady apple that she could hold in her foot. OR DO I JUST HAVE A GIANT PARROT?

( +2 more! )

And now, the pics you've all been waiting for... Chainsaw and Massacre, our new kittens. Zlato's voice teacher took in a stray pregnant cat, and we adopted two of her four babies.



Chainsaw is a medium-hair torti. She is one of the softest cats I have ever touched. She feels like a bunny.

She is named after the cat in this animated short by Julianna Cox:





Massacre is a sleek black short-hair. He loooooves to burrow around under fabric like skirts, blankets and the curtains.

( +11 more! )

They've met Morgan from a distance, and hissed and growled. Morgan, for his part, was soooo well behaved. He saw them and just started trembling so hard I thought he would faint. Ha ha! He leaned up against me and shook, staring at them, he was so excited, but made no attempt to go see them or whine or bark or anything. He sleeps in his kennel in there every night, and I'm hoping that will help them get used to him.

They haven't met Eew yet; that will be a very gradual introduction.

My mom's memorial on Thursday the 23rd went very well, much better than my stomach had been telling me it would go for several weeks. The flowers were beautiful, the contorted filbert we got was covered in sentiments and memories, everyone loved the photo board, and my eulogy didn't suck too much. I got to see a lot of people I haven't seen in a long time.

Then on Friday, my sister, dad and I went to a family reunion for my dad's side of the family up at Lake Wenatchee. We saw relatives we haven't seen in years and years, despite the fact that some of them live in the area, heh. I didn't remember any of the "kids" my age whom I apparently played with at past reunions. They'd say, "I remember you when you were this big!" And I'd think, "Whoa, I don't remember me at that age."

The reunion was far different from reunions I remember as a child. When I was a kid, many of the adult attendees were Deaf, and the reunion was "loud" with signing, and most of the noise was my sister and I and the other kids playing. This reunion was mostly English, and the only Deaf attendant was my dad (his brothers couldn't make it). There was still signing -- when they spoke to my dad. Someone commented how "quiet" it was, lacking in ASL. All of my dad's cousins signed, and there was translating for my dad, and my dad's cousin's ex-wife showed up with her new husband, even if she wasn't blood she's still family, and through my dad's cousin (who took off or something a few years ago) very active in the Deaf Community still. Her husband's son sort of... took to my sister and I. Heh. He followed us around, and talked to us. I think it's because we're *cool*. He was wearing a shirt the first day that said, "Video games destroyed my life. Luckily I have two extra lives." When I had a puppy on a leash (babysitting for a relation), he came over with his dad's dog -- which I didn't see him leading about any other times the whole weekend.

Sis and I went horseback riding after the reunion on Sunday. My sister rode a big half-draft named Bubba, and I rode a tiny Tobiano paint named Juniper.

After Wenatchee, dad, Jess and I went up into the North Cascades. We camped at a campground called Early Winters. I went on a hike on a snowshoe trail beside the creek, and saw three black-tailed (mule) deer, the first of which I only caught a glimpse of as it bounded away, the second who let me get fairly close before fleeing, and the third who just observed me, and was still there munching away as I walked back past her. Jess and I went wading in the icy creek and collected pretty rocks. Jess, dad and I took the binoculars and went stargazing.

The North Cascades are absolutely stunning -- I hadn't been since early childhood. Soaring mountains, jagged peaks, glaciers, crazy, bright green lakes.

After that, we went and camped on Camano Island in the Puget Sound, though Jess and I think it hardly qualifies as an island. It was a gorgeous campground, and I went down to the beach but there were fewer seabirds than I'd hoped for. It was so hot I hardly slept, and bugs were all over me, I think because I was sweating so badly.

On the next day's drive, we stopped at a Bald Eagle Refuge Area Thing. The interpretive center was only open in winter (the eagles winter there), but I went on a wetlands trail walk where I almost died of horrible horrible heat stroke, since the trail was entirely in the sun and the Northwest was having a heat wave.

The last night of our camping trip, we went to Mt. St. Helens National Volcanic Monument. It was the only campground we'd been to with hookups and MY GOD was I grateful for air conditioning. Also, showers. It felt soooo nice.

The next day we went to the Mt. St. Helens Interpretive Center and watched a film about the volcano blowing up in '80 (it was captioned! yay, that made me not feel bad about dragging dad in with us!), and peered at ancient photos, things that melted in the explosion, accounts of wildlife returning and so on. Ah, the event that shaped me and turned me into a Dragon. It was a blast and I so want to go back and crawl through Ape Caves and do some hikes on the edge of the mud flats, downed tree blast zones and stuff.

So I did lots of things I haven't done since I was a kid, and it was a memorable road trip around the Northwest like we used to take in my youth. Hehe.

So, birds. I saw soooo many birds, but only three new life-listers. To be honest, I would've done better if it hadn't been so hot and I wasn't so eaten alive by mosquitoes... I guess I'm a fair weather birder. But seriously, the heat was insane. (107 in Portland yesterday, around 100 in the campgrounds I was in.)

I saw: Robins everywhere!, Canada Geese, many Bald Eagles, including one looking haughty by the side of the road and one in the Bald Eagle refuge area, Spotted Towhees, Ospreys, Crows, American Goldfinches, Black-Eyed Juncos (including a freaking cute juvenile begging from its dad), Steller's Jay, Hairy Woodpecker, Barn Swallows, Cedar Waxwings, Black-capped, Chestnut-backed and Mountain Chickadees, Summer Tanagers, Red-breasted Nuthatch. My dad also pointed out a Black Plastic Bag Bird.

People who drive with birders in the car need to be stoic. My sister and I freaked out upon seeing birds out of the car window, like a haughty Bald Eagle haughtily sitting and staring out haughtily over his domain. My dad can't hear what we're exclaiming about either, so that doesn't help. He mostly just rolled his eyes and ignored us.

We looked for Stephen Jr., but didn't see him.

Birds I couldn't ID:

Puget Sound, some black-headed gulls. Their heads were entirely black, and they did flybys. Can't seem to figure out which bird of this type lives in the Puget Sound this time of year. (And other gulls that I didn't even try. Gulls. *twitch*

Various very dark sparrows in the Puget Sound area. Poss. very dark versions of sparrows I know, but they looked so different that I was at a loss.

Some other swallows, it was sunset and I couldn't ID by their silhouettes!

New life-listers:

* White Pelican -- 7/27, Columbia River, between Azwell and Pateros.
* Wood Duck -- 7/28, Diablo Lake.
* Brown Creeper -- 7/29, Camano Island State Park.

(My list remains pitiful. I really need to go out with a birding group. Otherwise I don't think I can be helped.)

Oh boy, they came! I've been wanting these for a while, but they've been out of stock. I really want a Cobra's Nest Hybrid, but I guess I'll have to wait on that. Sigh.




My new Purple Pitcher (S. purpurea ssp. venosa)!!

( Many more carnivorous plant pics, including my big ol' bog planting. )

Pictures! Here are photos of Pierre the hooded vulture taking my donation for the Future for Wildlife program. He took the money and put it into the donation box, for which he got a click and delicious treat.




( +1 )

I got a video of strawberryjeli giving him a donation as well.

And here are pictures of my new birdfeeder setup in the backyard. The hanging baskets are an awesome addition. I've seen a dozen butterflies feeding on the flowers, making it a butterfly feeding station as well, and the strawberries will be most delicious.



( +3, incl. closeup of birdbath )

So far, I haven't seen any birds on the feeders except Scrub Jays. Then yesterday I saw a baby Scrub Jay and realized that they'd nested in the big tree you see behind the feeders in the first pic again this year, so they're probably chasing off all the other birds from the yard. That's okay, I like Scrub Jays. :D And baaaaaaaaaby Scrub Jays especially!

And finally, here is a ceramic piece I did in the spring term. Unfortunately it cracked down the side, but the decoration is still awesome, so I plan on doing something in a series next term. Maybe a series of animal skeleton tiles -- and a Tser skeleton con badge! It'd be heavy, but awesome.



( +1 closeup )

This was done with the technique called mishima. I carved the design out of the dark-colored clay, then filled it with white slip, waited impatiently over a week for it to dry, and then scraped off the excess to reveal the design. Painstaking, but worth it.

For the short, intense summer term we're doing exclusively alternative firings. Friday, I made two pieces on the wheel (others cranked out four or five... I'm still getting the hang of it). They're being bisqued, and next class we'll be saggar firing them with a variety of materials like chicken manure, seaweed, copper sulfate, salts, string, and cedar branches. The results will be serendipitous! Other firings we're doing include wood fire, pit fire, salt fire, and naked raku (peel-away slip, horsehair/feather). I'm so excited. I hope my pieces come out!

The clay I got at the professor's recommendation is the groggiest clay I've ever encountered. It's so full of sand it looks like my sponge and other tools have been to the beach.

I cracked up.



Watch at 1:17. And best yet, ANYONE can use the Worx GT.

Even able-bodied young women.

1. You can ONLY answer 'Yes' or 'No'.

2. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone comments you and asks— and, believe me, the temptation to explain some of these will be overwhelming. Nothing is exactly as it seems.

( Yes/No Meme )

Feel free to ask about any, as per rules.

OMG! Next week is finals! Stress will be (mostly) over. <3 <3 This weekend, I have to make a webpage that reviews kittens. (Unless you all can think of a better thing for me to review.)

Just got back from a trip to Pittsburgh. It was Zlato's cousin's wedding. The music was awesome, as expected. Flew all day Friday, wedding Saturday, a trip to the National Aviary on Sunday (Honah and I sketched birds) and then flying all day yesterday. It was fun, and I loved seeing Zlato's family, but I'm really tired. Honah and I came back (and I paid money to get my ticket changed so I could fly with her instead of alone! panic!) for school but Zlato's still in PA.

I really can't wait for the end of this term. Next term will be whirlwind but a much lighter load.

This is my favorite delicious sauce that I put on nachos, tacos and burritos. Don't expect it to taste like cheese, or you'll be disappointed, but it's delicious in its own right. I love it with refried beans, avocado, onion and tomato. I could nom so much of this stuff.

1/4 cup Nutritional Yeast
1/4 cup Whole Wheat Flour
1 tsp Paprika
1 tsp Garlic Powder
1 tsp Salt
1 cup Water

In a medium saucepan, mix yeast, flour, paprika, and salt together. Add 1 cup water. Heat over low heat, stirring constantly, until it reaches desired thickness. (If you don't stir, it will get lumpy.)

You can use less garlic if you don't like it as much as I do; I use less salt than the recipe calls for. Also, you can stir in a tablespoon of vegan margarine at the end, after it has thickened up, if you'd like -- some people I know would be scandalized that I never do, say the fat is the best part, but I really can't tell the difference. Heh.

Tsercorn by =Indigo-Ocean on deviantART

Eeeeee. :D Indi drew my unicorn form.

Stolen from fareme.

( Girl Stuff )

I repotted my temperate carnivorous plants today. They're dormant right now so it's not really worth taking photos. I'm waiting for the parrot pitchers to be available from Sarracenia Northwest.

I want to make some planters in ceramics. Most ceramic planters at the store are unglazed on the inside, but carnivorous plants do better in planters that are glazed inside and out.

I made these in my beginning ceramic class. I can't wait to hang them up, I just need some chain!

The birdhouse is coil built. It is built to the size that wrens and chickadees prefer, 4 inches in diameter at the bottom, about 9 inches deep, with the 1 1/4 inch hole about 6 inches above the bottom. These little birds like cathedral ceilings!



It is stoneware clay, fired to cone 10. The glaze was complicated, despite it's look. The branches took four coats, plus a coat of wax resist. The body is glazed in a subtle celadon.

The inside is left unglazed, to give little baby birds a way to climb out when it's time to leave the nest!

( More photos, and matching birdfeeder, under the cut. )

Poll #1364014
Open to: Friends, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 18

Should I broadcast my Twitterings here via LoudTwitter?

Oh yeah. I'm tser on Twitter. Probably mentioned this before. Too tired to go look. -_-

Had a hoooooorrible day at school today. Oi. But, I bought myself an iPod touch. I've been wanting an iPod forever. Also, it's almost spring break. Two critiques and one exam left to go.

I am in serious sleep deficit.

This is long. If you just want the art, it's behind the cuts. XD

After FC I was busy at school, and then I got the stomach flu. Today I have tons of art homework, math homework, a paper for yoga, and the gryphon_xchange emails to do (last call for sign-ups!), but first I figured I'd scan the wonderful artwork I got at FC, and share with everyone.

zlatohrbitek and I went alone this year, and aaaamory decided to stay home so she wouldn't miss school and wouldn't catch con crud. It was very weird, not being a table bitch this year! We still managed to be insanely busy, somehow.

I started out the con *uber-way-over-the-top* shy. I've been much shyer and having more trouble with crowds and being alone since my mom died. A little afraid, but mostly just overwhelmed. It got better as the con went on, but I was still not as outgoing as I have been in the past.

I saw lots of wonderful people. More than I could ever acknowledge in my journal. I love going to conventions primarily for that reason... I get to connect with so many folks I don't get to see otherwise.

Ironically, some of them live something like less than five miles from me and we still rarely see them! That includes ayukawataur and ryokokitty. The last time we saw them was at our wedding. Zlato and I went out to dinner with them at FC one night to a little Mediterranean cafe just a short walk from the con hotel. It was really great to see them, we got to chat with ayukawataur quite a bit throughout the con despite running from place to place trying to get everything in.

The cafe opened just 3 months prior to the con, and it wasn't on any of the con restaurant lists or anything, which was unfortunate. We saw that several furs did find their way there, though. They were extremely nice and we ate there a bunch of times. Not too many vegan options around.

jaygryph was another local we saw there who we just don't see enough around here. However, I am going to bug him a great deal before Rainfurrest because I now have a goal -- make a Scram costume before the con. Those of you who know my Scram character know she's a decaying, diseased, barely-alive plague/sewer rat. Jaygryph knows his zombies, and he's good at building things, special effects, and technical aspects. I will pick his rotting brains for help in making Scram a good costume.

selasphorus and kynekh_amagire came to the con for one day. I went to the Art of Wings panel (I think that's what it was called, more on that later) and Lux was there too... we shared a crow wing and a dead sparrow. Kynekh made me a badge! First arts alert!

( Tserisa juxtaposed with Banana Slug )

Kynekh also made Zlato an absolutely adorable Pack Fox badge which he posted in his journal. (He carries my bag for me during cons because for some reason carrying a heavy bag for long gives me a headache. And because it's cute. He's my service animal.)

nambroth and eldarath were there, and it was fantastic to meet them in person. I got a watercolor sketch commission from Nam, and it was beyond my wildest dreams. I have a sketchbook with the theme "fantastic feathers" -- I'm just obsessed with feathers, so it's pretty much up to the artist what to put in there, as long as it has feathers. Feathered dragons, birds, gryphons, weasels with feathers, wings stuck on anything, phoenix, whatever. However, since I wanted the watercolor, it couldn't go in my sketchbook. Erm, next time I'll have to commission her for an ink sketch or something directly in the book. Heh. I need to ask her if I can post the pic I got from her, though.

Nam and Vantid ran the Art of Wings panel, which was fantastic. Not only extremely informative, but full of dead things. <3 Zlato seemed to enjoy it as well.

( I took what I learned and applied it to this drawing. )

I finally got to meet fishyboner! Zlato and I were so glad that she was there, not only because she's freaking awesome, but because we had been pondering what to get Honah as a gift from our trip. We were trying to think of an artist she had said she admired before, and one of those was Fishy. So we commissioned Fishy for a picture of Honah. When we told Honah, she said Fishy's art was "badass". That somes it up. Fishy herself is badass. The picture by Fishy is also in Zlato's journal.

Also, if anyone can tell me how to record to video from something recorded on TiVo, I would be eternally grateful. >_>


I also saw many people briefly, but did not get to spend much time with them, including tugrik, summer_jackel, countless artists I bebothered at their tables like digitalis and other people I simply passed by shyly, too meek to say hello, like rosequoll (whose ears turned out fantastic). (And, if I talked to you but didn't mention you here, it's probably because I'm too shy and wouldn't think you'd notice me anyway.)

I commissioned one other picture besides the watercolor sketch by Nam. That was a badge from Savannah Horrocks.

( Absolute fawning and delight here. )

Zlato also got another commission, from skulldog. It is absolutely gorgeous and I love the expressions it captured. It's so sweet. It has inspired me and now I want a whole sketchbook of drawings of Zlato the adventurer and his draconic mount, Tserisa, both clean and adult. (Very fantasy RP style.) It is NSFW but I am putting it here anyway!

( NSFW! Zlato and Tserisa after a long day of quests and stuff. )

Also, Clare Bell was at the con. I read the Ratha books over and over and ... over when I had was in Jr. High. I had a job in the school library, and during lulls in activity (shelving, scanning, laminating, checking books in and out) I would read. And the library had the Ratha books and also Clare Bell's book Tomorrow's Sphinx, and I fell in love with them. They're about prehistoric big cats, for those who haven't read them. Clare Bell was awesome. Not only is she an excellent animal-geeky author, she's a scientist, engineer, and high geek. She is on Twitter, RPs the Ratha world on her message board, loves fanfic, has been involved in scifi fandom for a long time, etc. So her reading and everything else was very cool.

She was also at the Furry Linguistics panel that Zlato and I went to, which was very fun. I've always been fascinated by conlangs, and had a bit of an interst in linguistics since that's what my dad's half of the family does (his brothers are/were all professors of language studies at various universities). I also was able to contribute a bit about animal sound anatomy that wasn't included, since the main linguistic expert running it, Linguisticat, I think? was an expert in how humans make sounds, which is very different than some animals, such as birds. Aspects of language such as body language, scent and so on were also discussed.

I think the hardest part of the con for me was that I kept thinking how much I wanted to share with my mom or show her.

And then the past week has been REALLY hard for me missing my mom. I've been crying a lot, and having absolutely horrible, graphic dreams. It's really tough.

And now I should go draw.

I would really like to be fed to vultures.

This is done by some religious groups in India (dogs can also consume the body). However, vulture populations have dramatically declined due to a painkiller fed to cows (now banned) that kills them if they eat the cattle's corpses, and this traditional rite is in danger even there. Obviously it would be hard to get permission to do that here.

I forgot to post about it! I'll be leaving for FC tomorrow. Anyone want to get together can reach me on my email, tserisa at gmail dot com, since I'll be taking my laptop. I'll be there from Thursday eve through Monday (I'll be flying back to Oregon Tuesday morning).

My sleep schedule is so so messed up. I only go to bed when I absolutely can't keep my eyes open anymore because I don't want to lie in bed and think.

Rules: For 8 days you have to post something that made you happy that day. Tag 8 people to do the same.

Day 2: So much snow. I haven't seen this much snow here in the valley in all my 28 years.

Day 1: Watching The Neverending Story.

I tag whoever thinks this might be beneficial to them.

Thank you, everyone. Really. You've been so kind and supportive. Every single message I got meant so much.

I try to keep busy. When I stop, I start to think, and it gets bad. We went to see the Messiah last night and that was really hard for me and I kept crying, because we took my mom to see it before, at the same church. The hardest part right now, even if I keep busy, is I keep thinking I should show things to my mom or tell her things. And I'll never share anything with her again.

We have about a foot of snow with half an inch (or more by now) of ice over the top, and snow on top of that. Zlato has a plane to catch super early in the morning on the other side of Portland, and he doesn't own chains or traction tires. I'm really worried. I need him to be safe.

I'm starting over on my happy things every day meme because I kind of lost heart on it.

Rules: For 8 days you have to post something that made you happy that day. Tag 8 people to do the same.

Day 1: Watching The Neverending Story.

I tag whoever thinks this might be beneficial to them.

My mom died today. Thank you everyone for being there.